So my birthday is this Thursday. And I am not really that excited. I could say that I'm looking forward to it. But, I'm not. I haven't looked forward to my birthday since I was 13 years old. After that not so much. So every year around this time I get depressed. I feel so bad because my boyfriend is looking forward to it. He is so cute.
So my mom will ask what is it I would like to do for my birthday or you know stuff like that. I tell I'm not sure I haven't really thought about it.
And the reason as to why I don't like my birthday. Is because I am scared. I don't know what to expect. I have a fear of the unknown. Just like I don't like the new year. Because of the unknown. I know change is a part of life. But, I have a hard time with change. I will do my best to adapt to change but I get in a weird mood. Just like everyday this week.
I am a little excited though. Because come on I'll be turning 21 and I can drink legally. And my mom is making drop danish. I fluffin love drop danish. that's an up. But other then that. I get drepressed.
I feel bad about how I feel. Because my little sister is counting down till my birthday and my boyfriend.
I am trying to be excited. I'm trying. Hopefully I can get over being depressed about my birthday. Because it's not fun and everyone finds it weird.
Hopefully in the next post I'll have something more cheery to talk about.
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